Finding You
by JimberlyShipper
Summary: This is a reaction fic to 13x06. So spoilers. Mostly canon except Destiel was established before Cas died. This is porn. There's lots of sex, just know that before you go in.


_**Disclaimer: The characters of**_ _Supernatural_ _**do not belong to me. This is a reaction fic to 13x06. It takes place during the episode. It was so Destiel. I had feels all over the place. This mostly canon, except Destiel is established. It's my headcanon that they would have for sure have gotten together after 11. I did one after 12, of course, this one will have nothing to do with that one. I only plan for this to be a oneshot. I hope you like!**_

Finding You

By Julia

They pulled up to the phone booth. After Dean got over the shock of there being one, his eyes filled with tears. It was _Cas_. Dean was shocked and trying not to run and knock him over with with a hug. Dean's thumb ran over his wedding ring, which he hadn't been to stop wearing. They'd gotten married eight months ago, a drunken decision, they'd gone to Vegas. Sam had been upset that he hadn't been invited, at first, but he'd gotten on board. Dean's eyes met his husband's, and it was like no time had passed. He moved, closing the distance between them, wrapping his arms around Cas' waist, and kissed him. Softly, at first, Sam and Jack were there, but he wasn't able to stop himself from kissing him more deeply. Cas responded, his arms had slid around Dean's neck. He pulled back to breathe, and looked into those gorgeous blue eyes. "Fuck, Cas."

Cas looked into those green eyes, and he got that butterfly feeling his stomach, he always got when he looked at Dean. His fingers stroked the nape of Dean's neck, earning a soft moan from his husband. Cas had his ring on too. He licked his lips and kissed his husband again, his fingers running through Dean's hair. He ignored the clearing of his brother in law's throat. Cas kissed him until he was breathless, and his toes were curling in his shoes. They broke apart then and Cas leaned his forehead against Dean's. "I missed you so much. I don't know where I was…. But I pissed off the guy in charge so much he sent me back."

This caused Dean to laugh, and once he had, Cas started laughing too. "Oh, shit, baby, I am so not surprised." Dean met his husband's eyes, and they smiled at each other. Dean let go of him, so Sam could say hi to him too. And Cas had to meet Jack. Dean all of a sudden, didn't have an issue with the kid anymore. His hand slid down and took Cas', his stomach feeling full of butterflies when their rings clinked. Dean hadn't felt that in months and felt really good. They walked over to Sam, and Cas let go of him to hug Sam. Jack was hanging back by the Impala. Dean met the Nephilim's eyes, and there was something in his eyes that Dean thought meant that this was because of him.

"Hey, Jack. Can I talk to you?" Dean asked, and the kid's eyes widened. He nodded, looking too scared to say no. He walked a few feet away with Dean. "Jack, I… I know that I've been an ass to you. I… I can't really talk about why. I wish I could. But… I'm going to be better with you." Dean couldn't bring himself to tell Jack what he had Sam. That he blamed Jack for Cas being gone. Yeah, it had been Lucifer who had killed him, but they had only been there in the first place because of Jack. Dean had stopped believing in in everything when Cas had been gone. He'd had to die for a case, and he'd wanted to stay dead. That had been the first time in a long time that he'd felt like that. Dean looked at Jack, who still looked scared. "Don't be scared, okay? I know I gave you reason to be scared of me. I'm… I'm sorry. I really am. I don't want you to be scared of me anymore." Dean wanted to ask him if this was because of him. He did notice that Jack had visibly relaxed. Dean scuffed his feet on the ground, and then he looked at Jack. "Did you… did you do this? Did you bring back my husband?" Dean asked, it hurt him to ask it, but he knew it was something that he had to know. Dean kept his eyes on those blue eyes that reminded him of Cas', even it was impossible. Dean knew that Jack considered Cas his father. He was surprised if he had to he would consider Jack a son. He already considered Claire his daughter. And he knew that Claire thought of him as a dad.

Jack eyed Dean. He hoped that Dean meant what he said. Jack looked over at Sam, and his father. Jack knew that Dean and Cas had been married before Cas died. "So… I can I call you dad now?" Jack asked curiously. He saw Dean's eyes rise to his hairline, but he gave Jack a slight nod. Jack looked over at Cas and Sam and then back at Dean. "You think I brought him back?" He asked, and Dean nodded again. "If it was me, I don't know I did it. But… I'm glad that you aren't going to be scary anymore…. Dad." Jack tried, and he let out a small laugh at the confused look on Dean's face. "You don't have to like it."

"No, I told you you could." Dean said, and waved Cas over. "Babe, come and meet Jack." He said. His husband walked over, but Sam stayed by Baby. Cas looked nervous. Dean reached down and took his husband's hand. "Cas, this is Jack. He's… he's the Nephilim. You should know… he calls you his dad. Says he remembers you talking to him in the womb." Dean knew they were going to have to talk about the way he'd been with Jack. Dean just didn't want to fight with Cas. He stroked the back of Cas' hand with his thumb. It filled him with so many feelings he couldn't express that Cas was back. Dean couldn't let go of hm. It was like he would disappear again.

Cas' blue eyes in Jack. He wasn't surprised that he was a teenager. They didn't really know much of what Nephilim were capable of. One had never lived before. Cas wondered what to say. He didn't stop Dean from letting go of his hand and sliding a protective arm around his waist. Cas knew why Dean was doing it. He met Jack's eyes, who to his credit, was waiting patiently for Cas to speak. "I'm Castiel Winchester. I'm.. well, Dean says you remember me. Dean and I are married. I am sure you already knew that. You can… if you consider me your father, I won't stop you." Cas didn't know that he didn't feel that Jack was family as well. He remembered preparing for Jack's birth. "I…. I remember getting ready for you. I don't… I don't know anything about what's been going on with you. I want to get to know you. But if I'm your father, then Dean is, too. So I don't want you disrespecting him, okay?" Castiel wasn't surprised when Jack nodded. Cas turned to look at Dean, who had a death grip on him. He kissed him softly. "Let's go home." He said, as tears gathered in husband's eyes. He reached to wipe the tears from Dean's cheeks. "Don't cry. I will never leave you again. Not even if it's not my choice." Cas remembered getting stabbed. He remembered hearing Dean cry out as he fell to the ground. Jack went to go to the Impala. Cas looked into Dean's eyes. "I'm sorry, Dean. I know this is Lucifer's fault…. But I'm sorry that we were separated. I love you. You know that I'll never stop."

Looking into those gorgeous blue eyes, Dean felt those butterflies in his stomach again. He knew that Cas was his soulmate. Dean had already known that but when he'd lost him it had really hit him. Dean wiped his cheeks with his free hand. His arm was still wrapped tightly around Cas' waist. He was afraid to let go. Dean really didn't want to let go. He didn't want lose Cas again. He loved him more than he had ever loved anyone in his whole life. Dean cradled Cas closer, burying his head in Cas' neck. He took a deep breath, and sniffed Cas' neck. He loved to smell Cas' neck. "I love you, too, Cas. I can't imagine living without you. I…. I need to tell you some things. But when we get back home." Dean wanted to talk to him when Sam and Jack weren't in earshot. He kept his nose deeply in Cas' neck. "I know we have to go home. I just… I kind of can't let go of you." Dean knew that he didn't have to say out loud why. Cas knew why. Dean stepped back, a lot reluctantly. "Come on, let's go home. There's a few things we need to talk about. Alone." His eyes met Cas', and there was so much said in that look. Dean reached down to take Cas' hand, and he led them to the car. Dean was glad to see Sam was in the back with Jack. Cas refused to let Dean open his door and got in the car. Dean watched him. Cas was back. It was a miracle.

Later that evening, Cas was sitting on their bed, and Dean was getting ready for bed. Dean was only wearing a pair of boxer briefs and it was very distracting. Cas reached for Dean's hand, stopping him from putting on the pair of pj bottoms in his hand. "Don't, you look so so hot." Cas said, blushing. Dean smiled at him. Cas really wanted to make love to Dean. Cas was going to bring it up but then he saw the serious look on his face. "Dean? Are… you okay? You look very serious." Cas wondered if this was about what it was Dean had to say about what they had to talk about. Cas was very scared about what Dean had to say. "What's… is this about what you said we had to talk about?"

Taking a deep breath, Dean sat down next to his husband. He took Cas' hand. His eyes brushed with tears. "I… Cas, there's… while you were gone, I was really fucked up. I… I had to die to solve a case… and I wanted to stay dead." He wasn't surprised to see the eyes he loved fill with tears and a look of shock over Cas' face. "I'm sorry that I have to tell you that. I just… I couldn't live without you. I stopped believing in anything. I prayed to Chuck to bring you back… and nothing. I… I don't care what happens to my mom. Chuck…. Amara, should never have brought her back." Dean's eyes brushed with tears and they spilled down his cheeks. Cas already knew what Mary had done. Dean couldn't forgive her. He'd been glad to have her back, too. At first.

Tears brushed his eyes. "Dean, I'm so sorry that you felt that way." Cas truly hated his big brother in that moment and wanted to kill him for what he'd done. Cas brushed his hand across his husband's cheek, wiping tears off. "Dean, I… I hate that you went through that. I won't make you talk about Mary." Cas knew that Dean wouldn't talk about it even if he did try and get him to talk about it. Cas knew his husband well. He wrapped an arm around Dean's waist. "I.. seriously, Dean, I want to kill my fucking brother for doing this to us. To you." His eyes spilled over with tears. His voice shook as he spoke. "Dean.. I can't… I do believe that you were that upset. I am very unsurprised. You.. I would be the same if we were reversed. I would die without you." Cas would never make it. He knew that. He brushed tears off Dean's cheek. "I love you. I really, I'm sorry that I was gone. Don't tell me I don't have to be sorry. We both know that this is all my fault. I was the one who put us in this place in the first place. I had to be stubborn and take Kelly away." Cas couldn't stop feeling guilty. He wished that he could. Cas supposed that he might not ever stop feeling guilty. It was just how it was, but he also was a Winchester now. Guilt was a thing they did well. Cas didn't think he could just stop. Dean was still crying. "You don't have to feel that way any longer."

That was hard, to see Cas that emotional. Dean reached to wipe tears off Cas' face. "I'm going to be okay now, Cas. I have you back. I need you to never leave me again. I know that's unrealistic, but I can't lose you like that ever again." Dean kissed Cas then. He didn't want to talk about the way he'd been with Jack. Dean kissed him deeply, wrapping his arms around Cas' waist. He lifted Cas' shirt, untucking it from his slacks. Cas kissed back, it had been too long. Dean unbuttoned Cas' shirt, his fingers moving quickly. They both moved quickly then, getting off Cas' clothes and then Dean tossed off his underwear. Cas flipped them, straddling Dean. Dean was definitely the bottom. He leaned down to kiss him, his hands moving up and down Dean's abs. Dean shivered underneath him. Cas rocked his hips against Dean's, as Dean slipped a finger into Cas' entrance. He moved it inside Cas, as Cas leaned to kiss him. He sucked on Dean's tongue, causing Dean to groan against Cas' lips. Cas moved to grab some lube, he was ready for Dean to be inside him. He spread the lube on Dean's long hard cock and eased himself onto it, his hands splayed on Dean's abs. Dean reached and his long fingers grasped Cas' cock, matching his movements to Cas' hips. Cas leaned to kiss him as his hips moved, they were both groaning as they moved. Dean nibbled on Cas' bottom lip as his hand moved up Cas' cock. It had been so long and it felt so good. Dean's breath got shallow.

Cas was coming then, cum covering both of them. He kept his hips moving, wanting to Dean to come too. He played with the hair in Dean's treasure trail. Dean's back arched hard against the mattress. His hands stroked Cas' abs, his breath coming in quick pants. "Oh, fuck, Cas. FUCK!" Dean cried, and then he was coming. His hands stroked Cas' abs as he came. He loved coming inside his husband. Cas moved to the bathroom to off Dean's room and got a towel to rub them clean. Dean was laying on the bed, panting. "Fuck, baby." Dean managed, as Cas wiped cum off his stomach. Dean's eyes were starting to slip closed. Very quickly, he fell asleep.

He would go and talk to Sam and then he would back to lay with Dean. Cas could actually sleep now, he'd lost Grace. He just had trouble with sleeping. Cas put on on a pair of Dean's boxer briefs and a robe and went to the library, and sure enough, he found Sam. Cas moved to sit with him at the table. Cas didn't see Jack, and assumed he was in his room. He wondered if Jack had to sleep. Cas brushed his hand through his sex mussed hair, blushing. "You…. I need to talk to you, Sam." Cas noticed that Sam was a little uncomfortable, Cas assumed it was because he knew what Cas and Dean had done. "I'm sorry, Sam, Dean and I were separated for months."

As much as he knew that, Dean didn't want to know for sure they'd had sex. He was looking for a case, he couldn't sleep. Sam brushed hair out of his eyes. "It's okay, Cas, I know you guys had sex." Sam slid his laptop aside so he could focus on Cas. "Look, I know my how my brother is. He didn't tell you about how he was with Jack. I've been trying to help Jack be good. He wants to be like you. He's been so trying so hard to do the right thing. Dean's…. He's been planning to kill Jack until today. Dean… we had a huge argument about it. He accused me of having forgotten that the situation with Jack got you killed. He was… he was really bad off, Cas. I don't… if you hadn't come back, I don't know what I would have done."

That really didn't surprise him. Cas knew his husband well. "I am not surprised about any of that. He told me how broken he was." Cas' eyes brushed with tears. "I… I really wish I knew if Lucifer was dead." Cas wondered if Dean thought Jack had something to do with Cas being back, and that was why he was on board with Jack now. Cas brushed his tears off his cheeks. "Speaking of Jack, I have some questions and… I don't have my Grace anymore." He wasn't surprised when Sam touched his arm in sympathy. "Does Jack have to sleep?" Cas asked, wondering if he really wanted to know. Sam nodded. "Yeah, but he doesn't need more than an hour or so." This was interesting. Cas was gearing up another question when Jack came in, carrying his own laptop.

"I found a case!" Jack exclaimed happily. "In Dodge City." He had no idea where Kansas was but he was so excited he'd found a case. He moved to show Sam his laptop. "Someone was murdered by being pulled into the ground." He looked at Castiel then, and noticed how mussed his hair was. "Castiel, why is your hair so messy?" He was a bit nonplussed when they laughed. Jack cocked his head to the side. "Why is that funny?" Jack was still learning to how to do things and so he asked a lot of questions. He remembered Cas, though, and he remembered feeling safe with Castiel. Jack hoped he really had found a case for them.

Before either of them could answer, Dean joined them, wearing an open robe with his boxer briefs. He moved to sit on Cas' lap. "You left me alone." He accused sleepily. He leaned into Cas as his husband's arms slid around him. Dean blinked at the bright lights. "What's the kid so excited about?" He asked, his eyes still drooping. That's when Jack told him that he'd found a case in Dodge City. Even with how tired he was, Dean's face lit up in a smile. "Holy shit. We're going!" He exclaimed. Cas wasn't surprised, Sam rolled his eyes, and Jack grinned happily. Dean patted one of Cas' arms that around his waist. "Come on, I need sleep. We are going."

The following evening, they were checked into their hotel room. Dean's eyes were wide with excitement at all the cowboy features. His suitcase was huge. He'd never been so excited for a case. Dean moved through the swinging saloon doors to put his bag on the floor by his and Cas' bed. Cas followed him, putting his duffel bag next to Dean's. Dean turned to him, wrapping his arms around Cas' waist. "Sam's going to take Jack to get something for us to eat, we have some time." He purred against Cas' neck. "I really want to fuck you wearing a cowboy hat." Dean started kissing Cas' neck, and Cas moaned, his arms sliding around Dean's neck. Dean kept up his kissing, ignoring his brother's grunt of annoyance as he stuck his head in to tell them they were leaving. Dean started to undress Cas, for once, Dean wanted to be inside his husband. Dean kissed down Cas' bare chest, and worked Cas out of the rest of his clothes, and pushed Cas gently to the bed. He placed himself in between Cas' legs, and took the long cock that he loved to touch in his mouth. Cas gasped. They hadn't done this in awhile, even before Cas was killed. Dean's mouth worked Cas' dick, one hand stroking Cas' balls and the other sitting on Cas' hip. He stroked his pelvis bone as well. Cas groaned and arched back into the mattress. "Mmm…." Dean hummed around his husband's cock. He moved his mouth, he wanted to get Cas close but not come. He wanted Cas to come inside him. Dean deepthroated him.

"If you want me to come inside you, you'd better stop that." Cas gasped breathlessly. Dean sucked once more and then lubed Cas up. He took a deep breath and got undressed, putting a cowboy hat on his head. Cas looked at him and his cock got even harder. Dean took a deep breath, and carefully eased himself on Cas' cock. He cried out, they'd done this before but not often. Dean started to move, his hips moving quickly. Cas reached up and palmed Dean's cock, his long fingers stroking Dean's shaft. He was able to cup and tickle Dean's balls at the same time. Dean gasped breathlessly as he rode Cas, the cowboy hat perched jauntily on his head. Dean gasped as he moved deeper on Cas, taking more of him inside. Dean clenched around him, and Cas' hand on his cock stroked harder. Dean cried out Cas' name. Cas gasped. "Fuck, Dean, baby, oh my dad." He was going to come very shortly. Because Dean had already gotten him hard. Cas came, his hand cupping Dean's balls. Dean gasped and his hands spread over Cas' abs, and he was coming. Cas leaned up and switched them, so he could lick Dean clean. Dean shivered as Cas' tongue moved over his cock. Dean gasped, trying to catch his breath as Cas lay beside him, wiping the cum off his stomach. Cas tossed the old towel to the floor. "Oh, fuck, Dean."

Dean moved to cuddle up to him. He wrapped an arm around Cas' waist. "Fuck, baby, that was amazing." He had loved that. "Possibly best sex ever." They heard a cry of "Jack, no!" and their son had poked his head in the room. Dean quickly pulled something over them. "Jack, you really ought to learn to knock before you enter a bedroom that we're in. Did you get food?" Dean asked, refusing to be embarrassed. His husband had covered his face with his hands. Dean wasn't able to keep from smiling at Jack's horrified face as he mumbled a yes and backed out of the room. Dean laughed. "That poor kid is so traumatized." He said, his shoulders shaking with laughter. He moved to get some clothes on they could eat.

Five minutes later, they had joined Sam and Jack. The others had gotten burgers and fries. Sam had gotten a salad. Jack looked at his fathers. "What were you doing in there?" He asked incredulously. "You were naked." He was thinking he might know what they had been doing but he didn't know for sure. Jack opened his burger, a bit nonplussed at the look on Dean's face. He could tell that he was holding back laughter. Jack hadn't seen this side of Dean before and it was throwing him for a loop. Jack picked up a fry and ate it, refusing to look anywhere but at his parents. Jack didn't know what he thought they would say in answer. He ignored Sam saying his name. Castiel was blushing deeply. Dean just burst out laughing as he opened his burger.

"We were having sex, kid." Dean told him. "It's something adults do when they love each other." Dean didn't want to explain more than that. It was enough that they might have scarred Jack for life. "Just learn to knock and you won't see it again." Dean took a sip of soda. "Okay, Sam, Jack, you guys can and go interview the ME, tomorrow, and Cas and I will check out the crime scene." He didn't want to let Cas out of his sight. "I won't let Cas out of my sight. And no, that part is non negotiable." Dean looked at the two of them firmly. Dean was really afraid of letting Cas out of his sight. "I won't leave him ever again."

Sam sighed but he knew better than to protest. "Fine. But I'm not sleeping in that room with you two. I don't want to be subjected to what Jack just was." Sam met his brother's eye headon. "I'm very happy for you two. I am. But I don't want to see… my brother having sex." Sam had walked in on that a few times and didn't want to do it again. Before, it had been meaningless sex to Dean. This was, for the first time, making love for Dean. Sam honestly was glad for Dean. Sam knew that it was like to have sex that was making love. First with Jess, then Amelia. Sam didn't go out and do the casual sex thing. It just wasn't how he operated. Sam was glad Dean had settled down.

"If he'd knocked he wouldn't have seen anything." Dean shrugged a shoulder. He was grinning but Cas was blushing. Dean leaned to kiss him. "It's okay, Cas, you are adorable when you're embarrassed." Dean loved it when Cas was embarrassed. "We haven't seen each other in months. We're going to be a lot affectionate for awhile." Speaking of, Dean had one arm wrapped tightly around Cas' waist. He was eating one handed. Cas seemed to want to relax a little. Dean wasn't going to let go. He didn't want to let go. Dean was only not putting his head in Cas' neck because he was eating. If this case hadn't been in Dodge City he'd have let Sam handle it and stayed home with Cas.

Cas met Jack's eye. He was looking at his parents with a horrified expression. Cas supposed he could get that, after being on Earth for so many years. Cas also was sure he wouldn't want to see Chuck having sex. Chuck was bisexual, and that had gone a long way with Cas realizing and accepting he was gay. Cas was glad he'd been able to accept or he may never have gotten with Dean. Cas looked to Jack. "You can ask us anything you'd like to know. I don't blame you for being horrified. If I saw my father having sex I would be upset too. But Dean is right. You should knock." Cas had never been so embarrassed before. But he knew that Dean wasn't. Dean wasn't easily embarrassed. Cas actually loved that about you.

Jack's brow furrowed and Sam put his head in his hands. Jack knew why Sam was doing that. Jack loved to ask questions. Jack ate a few fries. "How does… I did some reading on sex…. But how does it work with two men? What… what is it that you that you do?" Jack asked, and he didn't miss the groan his uncle let out. Jack finished his burger. "Because…. There isn't the same kind of mechanics involved." Jack's brow remained furrowed. He was trying to picture it and he couldn't. Jack ignored Sam, who was covering his ears, and Jack wondered why he didn't just leave the room.

A smile played on Dean's lips. "Well, with two guys it works differently. With guys, one is the top, and one is the bottom." With this, Sam picked up his jacket and walked out. Dean wasn't able to keep the chuckle from bubbling up. "Whomever is the bottom, ixs the one who gets the other one's cock up his ass." With this, Jack's eyes moved to his hairline. "Of course there's other things too. It all depends on what you like. But we don't have to talk about all of them." He looked at Jack, who still looked confused. Dean shared a look with Cas, who kept his face impassive. Cas was a stubborn guy. Dean looked back at Jack. "Do you want to know anything else?"

Cas' ears began to ring as Dean started to tell Jack about blow jobs and rimming. Cas couldn't believe they were talking about this with Jack. Cas ignored Dean's attempts to involve him in the conservation. Cas didn't want to talk about this. Cas wondered if Jack was really this inquisitive. He got up to throw away the trash. Cas' ears were red with embarrassment. He noticed that Dean kept glancing at him until he moved to sit with Dean again. As soon as he did, Dean put his arm back around his waist. Cas wanted to object with what they were talking about, but he knew that he couldn't speak up now. He knew how much Dean needed to be touching him right now. He understood that. Cas leaned into him, even if he was totally mortified with this. "What Dean should be telling you is that before you have sex with someone you should be in love. It's never the same when you aren't in love. I have only ever slept with Dean. So I don't know from experience. But Dean does. He told me after our first time together that it was the best sex that he'd ever had. And it was because he loved me. I can't even tell you what that meant to me. I don't… one reason is because I'm not telling you why. But it really… I loved Dean even more for saying that." Cas' eyes even brushed with tears. "Now, that's enough. I know you don't need to sleep much, but get ready for bed. We're all going to get some sleep." Cas kept his eyes on Jack until he'd done as bid.

A few hours later, and Cas heard noises coming from the living room area of the room. He assumed it was Jack, Sam had been dead asleep on the couch as soon as he had gotten back. Cas got up, he was in one of Dean's tee shirts and some pj bottoms. He had only been in a light sleep. He moved carefully, his husband slept wrapped around him tightly. Cas, yawning, went out and found Jack looking at a laptop. Cas rubbed his eyes. "What are you doing, Jack?" He asked. He went to grab a can of soda out of his bag and cracked it open. He looked a long sip. "I'm sorry that you can't sleep. I have trouble with it now. I've lost my Grace."

Jack had spent some time looking up gay porn, and he was kind of grossed out. But the hetero sex had grossed him out too. Jack was looking up things for the case. His eyes lit up when he found something. "I'm going to go tell Dad!" He grinned excitedly. He only barely heard Cas calling out to him not to and that Dean slept like a bear. Jack cried out in surprise when Dean pulled out a gun at him. Dean growled and Jack backed up into Cas. Jack cleared his throat. "Dad, it's just me. I found something." He said meekly. He let out a sigh of relief when Dean put the gun down. Jack wasn't able to keep the smile off his face when the first thing Dean said was who's making me coffee?

A few minutes later, and they were all getting dressed. Jack had made coffee and Dean had his hands wrapped around the mug. It was decided that Sam and Jack would head on to the Morgue. Cas started to stand as well, but his husband pointed to his coffee cup. Then he gave Cas a puppy dog look that clearly said please come and sit with me. Cas sighed but indulgently went to sit with Dean. As soon as he had, Dean tugged him close, and Cas was tucked against his husband tightly. Cas didn't really mind of course. He tucked his head in Dean's neck. "I… I need to tell you something, Dean." Cas was going to tell him that he didn't have his Grace any longer. Cas wasn't that upset about it. Assuming he didn't die again, he wouldn't have to grow old without Dean. Or rather, go on living and living without Dean, who would die eventually. He wouldn't have to go through that. He could grow old with Dean. Dean looked at him, waiting for him to speak. Cas took a deep breath. "Dean, I lost my Grace. I am going to be able to grow old with you." He wasn't at all surprised by the tears gathering in Dean's eyes. Cas let his hand move out and brush some tears from Dean's cheek. "Don't cry, Dean. I freaked out at first, but I want this. I've been thinking. I've been alive for eons… but I've never loved anyone. Until you. I kind of believe that I was meant to be with you. I was meant to pull you out of hell." Cas knew Dean didn't believe in things like that, but Cas did.

Reaching out, Dean cupped Cas' chin in his hand. "I love you. I… you know I don't believe in that fate stuff. But if you do, I understand that. But Cas, you know that I love you. I'm not going to stop. If you don't have your Grace, that's not going to get me to leave you. You know that. I will never leave you again. Nothing… there's…. I know what life without you is like for me. I can't… I can't be without you." He took a big sip of his coffee. "I accept you for who you are. Plus, this means you can actually sleep with me all night." Dean was very touched by the idea of this. He set down his mug, and kissed Cas deeply, sucking on his tongue. Cas groaned against his mouth. "We've got to be quick." Dean whispered against his lips. He kissed him deeply, his hand reaching out and touching Cas' chest, he wanted to be able to feel Cas' heartbeat as they kissed. Dean started to undo the buttons on Cas' shirt. He wasn't surprised to find Cas arching into the touch of Dean's fingers on his chest. Dean finished undressing Cas, and he flipped him so he was facing the couch. Dean's tongue went to Cas' hole and licked it. His cock was already getting hard in his underwear as he tongued Cas' hole. Then he licked a finger, and ran the finger around Cas' hole before he slipped the finger inside. This caused Cas to moan.

Cas groaned as Dean slipped another finger in the pucker of his anus. Cas groaned more as Dean crooked his fingers inside him. Cas' breath was shallow. "Dean… I… I need you inside." He managed to say. He was barely able to catch his breath. He was so turned on. Just as he was getting ready to beg again, he was filled with his husband's cock. Cas gasped as Dean's hips began to move. Cas groaned breathlessly and his hand moved to his own cock to match the strokes Dean's hips were making. He was glad he had big hands. His hand tried to match the movements that Dean's hips were making. Cas' face was pressed into the sofa, and at the feel of Dean's hips hitting his, his cock got even harder.

It felt so good, making love to Cas again. Dean was very turned on right now. He was trying to hold his orgasm in, but he knew it was coming. Dean came then, grasping Cas' hips. He groaned out Cas' name. Cas came as well, and Dean really hoped that they hadn't gotten any on the couch. Dean didn't want to have to explain that. They both moved to get dressed again. Dean was having trouble catching his breath. He looked at Cas, whose face was flushed. Dean cupped his jaw. "I love you. I'm… I'm glad that you're back. I am so glad that I can't even tell you how glad I am." He kept his eyes on those blue eyes. Dean loved those eyes. They had haunted his dreams while Cas had been gone. Dean knew every nuance of those eyes.

Tears brushed Cas' eyes. He swallowed hard and looked into Dean's eyes. "I… I still remember hearing you crying out when… when I was falling." Tears filled Dean's eyes too. Dean was not usually one to show emotion. Even to Cas. Cas was glad Dean was letting him. Cas wiped his eyes. "I love you, too, Dean. So much. I am… I wish I could change all of this. I do. But we have to just get through this together." He reached up to wipe tears off Dean's cheeks. His fingers lingered as he touched him. Dean's eyes fluttered shut briefly. When they opened again Cas spoke. "I'll keep finding you, Dean. After this life, I'll find you in the next." They shared a look, and they smiled at each other. Cas knew Dean knew that it was true, and that was enough for him.

 _I wanna lay in your arms  
When the world is burning  
I wanna dig your heart  
Take away your hurting  
Kiss me and tell me I'm fine and forget we're dying  
I wanna feel you tonight like the very first time_

 _Let's run away baby  
Drive straight into the moonlight  
Kiss me and tell me you're mine_

 _Like no one's watching  
Like time is stopping_

 _I know forever don't exist  
But after this life  
I'll find you in the next  
So when I say "forever"  
It's the goddamn truth  
I'll keep finding, finding you_

 _I'm gonna search for your love  
Right through hell and heaven  
Millions of years yet to come  
And in all dimensions I know you'll always be  
My happy ending  
My happy ending_

 _ **Author's note: So, this has been coming since the ep aired. I just, oh my Chuck, the feels. And that song is so Destiel I've been waiting to use it since I first heard it. It's like Kesha wrote it for Destiel. I didn't plan all the smut. This is just flat out porn. And I will readily admit that. I hope it didn't deter anyone from reading it. I know smut isn't everyone's thing. I also didn't expect it to be as long as it was, either. But that's okay. Not sure what will be updated next or if it's going to be another oneshot. I hope ya'll enjoyed this. I know Dean's a bottom. Just had to play around a bit with that. XD. I thought it turned out a lot hot. XD. Review if you like!**_


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